Fine Prints

WHAT WOMEN MEAN WHEN THEY SAY...
01.Yes=No
02.No=Yes
03.Maybe=No
04.We need this=I want this
05.I am sorry=you'll be sorry
06.We need to talk=I need to complain
07.Sure,go ahead=You'll pay for this later
08.Do what you want=You'll pay for this later
09.I am not upset=Of course I am upset,you moron and You'll pay for this later
10.Are you listening to me?=Too late,you're dead
11.You have to learn to communicate=Just agree with me
12.Be romantic,turn out the lights=I have flabby thighs
13.You're so manly=You need a shave and you sweat and stink a lot
14.Do you love me?=I am going to ask for something expensive now
15.It's your decision=The correct decision should be obvious by now
16.You're certainly attentive tonight=Is sex all you ever think about?
17.I'll be ready in a minute=Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV
18.How much do you love me?=I did something today that you're really not going to like me

AND WHAT MEN MEAN WHEN THEY SAY...

01.I am hungry=I am hungry (for both : Chicken & Chicks)
02.I am sleepy=I am sleepy (Sex is Over)
03.I am tired=I am tired (Premature ejaculation)
04.Nice dress=I'd like to have sex with you now
05.I love you=I'd like to have sex with you now
06.I am bored=I'd like to have sex with you now
07.What's wrong?=I guess sex is out of the question
08.May I have this dance?=I'd like to have sex with you now
9.Can I call you sometime?=I'd like to have sex with you in the future

10.Do you want to go to a movie?=I'd like to have sex with you in the future
11.Can I take you out to dinner?=I'd like to have sex with you in the future
12.Will you marry me?=I want to make it illegal for other men to have sex with you
13.You look tense,let me give you a massage= I'd like to have sex with you now
14.Let's talk=I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and then I'd like to have sex with you now
15.I don't think those shoes go with that outfit=I'm gay

Remember these 2 golden rules
Rule no 1--Never lose money
Rule no 2--Never forget rule no 1

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